What Do I Do To Unwind?

Surfing the Net for Humour
 

If you find for your jokes there's no call
And you can't get published at all
For the joker in you
With laughs that are new
There's always the URL wall
The Great Hall of Humour
Blonde's Bastion :Blonde Jokes
 Middle-age Manor : Matured Whine
Poet's Portaloo : Humorous Poetry
DEFINITIONS TO MAKE YOU SMILE :

  Brevity is the soul of lingerie

   Belly dancing: navel manoeuvers

   Bankruptcy: Kiss of death

   Declining moral standards: evilution andards: evilution

   Aerobics: flex education

   Cash purchases: debt-defying acts

   Buying a house: cashtration

   Polyunsaturated: parrot in a raincoat.

   Guiness Book of Records:  CD of Irish drinking songs.

   Acrostic: An angry insect.

   Metronome: A city elf.

   Stucco: What you get when you sit on gummo

    Khakis: What you use to start your automobile in Boston.

    Psychologist: A person that pulls habits out of rats.
 

  OXYMORONS I LIKE :

        Genuine imitation

          Same difference

          Act naturally

          Almost exactly

          Business ethics

          Taped live

           Peace force

           Temporary tax increase

            Computer jock

            Plastic glasses

            Computer security

            Political science

            Tight slacks

             Rap music

             Microsoft Works

   The difference between school and life: 
       In school, you're taught a lesson, then given a test.
       In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson. 

   The difference between an optimist and a pessimist:
       An optimist laughs to forget, a pessimist forgets to laugh.

 

PROCRASTINATOR'S CREED:
 

You may wish to delay reading this until you have more free time.

1.  I believe that if anything is worth doing, it would have been done already.

2.  I shall never move quickly, except to avoid more work or find excuses.

3.  I will never rush into a job without a lifetime of consideration.

4.  I shall meet all of my deadlines directly in proportion to the amount of
     bodily injury I could expect to receive from missing them.

5.  I firmly believe that tomorrow holds the possibility for new technologies,
     astounding discoveries, and a reprieve from my obligations.

6.  I truly believe that all deadlines are unreasonable regardless of the
     amount of time given.

7.  If at first I don't succeed, there is always next year.

8.  I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my
     mind.

9.  I shall always begin, start, initiate, take the first step, and/or write the first
     word, when I get around to it.

10.  I will never put off till tomorrow, what I can forget about forever.

Blonde's Bastion :  Blonde Jokes
   Middle-age Manor : Matured Whine
   Poet's Portaloo : Humorous Poetry











Not all jokes tickle my funny bone but the urls below will take you to the funniest sites I have found so far. I particularly enjoy puns. PLEASE email me if you can recommend other sites. :-)  (-:
http://www.cybercheeze.com/
http://big-gyant-head.com/
http://enchantedmind.com/humor1.htm


 Reading Science Fiction/Fantasy
I read other genre too - history, mystery, romance but Sci-Fi is my favourite method of escaping somewhere unreal enough to feel unchallenged while stimulated.
Here are the authors I currently enjoy most. If you can suggest others...email me!
Anne McCaffrey Pern series and others
Melanie Rawn Sun Runners series and Exiles series
Julian May  The Saga of the Exiles and others
L.E. Modesitt Jr. The Saga of the Recluse and Spellsong Cycle
Raymond Feist The Riftwar Saga and others
Robert Heinlein All those old ones :-)
Frank Herbert The Dune series


Travel
New Zealand is a great place to travel around, we have marvellous weather and glorious sights of the real sort. Like many other Kiwis, though, I feel the urge to prove that the rest of the world exists. I can categorically state that Australia, Fiji and Bali are not figments of the television programmers' imaginations.
Here are a few sites about Godzone (NZ)
http://www.channel8.net/newzealand/home.htm